Swim meet vs soccer game

Soccer Tournament

*  75 degrees and sunny – nice breeze
*  Haven’t opened book I brought during breaks in game – busy shooting the shit
*  Got an email with game times. Games last 45 minutes. No chance of missing the game.
*  Special area in park for open alcoholic beverages!
*  Two options for seating. Lay on a blanket in the grass or bring your own camp chair with footrest option
*  Food options – Chipotle close by.
*  Playing against better kids and losing.
*  Four hours, three hours of play time.
*  Bathrooms? Port A Potties

Swim Meet

*  98 degrees – air as thick as a brick
*  Haven’t opened book I brought during down time in meet (could have read three!) – busy shooting the shit
*  Ten dollar heat sheet. Memorized time line. Blink and you miss it.
*  Cocktails? You wish!
*  Two options for seating. Metal bleachers or bring your own camp chair and if you are lucky you will find a tiny square unfold it most of the way.
*  Food options – Chipotle close by. I research this.
*  Swimming against faster swimmers. Excited about this.
*  My kid is swimming one 30 second event in two hours.  Comes back two hours later, sits around for two hours and swims for 30 seconds again.  Glad it wasn’t 32 seconds.
*  Bathrooms? Every seat is socking wet. Does pool water kill pee germs?

Soccer Tournament and Swim Meet

Overpriced tie-dye t-shirts AND EVERYONE yelling KICK! Who knew?

I spent the morning at the soccer tournament and the evening at finals. It was a day filled with kids laughing, parents cheering, children succeeding and parents rejoicing. There are lots of crazy parents out there. Lucky for me I didn’t spend the day with any of them. It was a day filled with lifelong memories.




You’re a loser baby

Just got this email from one of our rec soccer coach:

Dear Parents,

I understand your disappoint and frustration with our season this year. The girls have gone from being undefeated for two years to a season without a single win. We were quite simply outplayed this season.

That being said, I hope that you can see the improvements our team has made throughout this season. The girls are playing as a team, playing hard and playing smart. I look forward to our spring session.

Coach Awesome

I immediately replied “who the hell complained”. Immediate response “everyone but you”.

I freaking hate team sports. It is so confusing to me… A few things happen:

The team and my kid play for shit – I blame everyone, kid blames the team

The team plays awesome my kid plays for shit – I blame my kid, she blames her best friend for telling her she looks funny

The team plays for shit my kid plays awesome – We should quit swimming and play travel soccer – world cup baby!

Team plays well my kid plays awesome – It was the red bull and pixie sticks before the game

Aside from that, I could give a rats ass if we lose. We swim.

We lose. We only lose. I don’t even know what the hell winning is. Maybe gold medal at the Olympics. Maybe. But who the hell wins in swimming? We live in DC metro. Even if you DO get first at a meet, there are 10 other meets running that same day all over the area. Chances are pretty good that someone, somewhere is kicking your ass! And someone out in California is kicking theirs.

Think I am lying? Ever see a national record be set? NO? I bet you have. You were probably playing on your ipad, reading a book, texting, sleeping, buying nachos or sitting outside getting some fresh air. I went to a meet recently and several national records were being set. About 10% of the people there were paying attention. No banners fell from the ceiling, no music played and no American Idol confetti fell from the sky. A few people clapped and then do you know what happened? The next race started. The moment of glory? More like a nanosecond.

I hope that when you go to a swim meet you watch your kid. You hope they do their best. Cheer for your friends kids and don’t be happy when other kids do bad. Winning isn’t everything. As a matter of fact, it isn’t anything.